I was visiting a church a few weeks ago, sitting way in the back, when someone a few rows ahead of me came up after the service and asked if I sang. I mean I like to sing, but I wouldn’t consider myself a singer. Which she interrupted with praises.
Now, I share this not because of my vocal abilities. I share it because I don’t consider myself a singer because way back when I was in 6th and 7th grades, it was drilled into my head that I wasn’t a singer by two adults in my life - one at school and one in church. So now it is really hard for me to sing - or hear comments about my singing.
Vocationally, I’ve confronted part of that - as I’ve sang at funeral homes and at the bedsides of congregation members. But the praise part, well, that I’m still wrestling with.
All of us have stuff. Things that were said to us when we were small that have effected how we see ourselves, the world, and God. And that’s part of what we bring to spiritual direction. All of the stuff. Stuff that maybe we have let seep into our bones and others that we have wrestled with in our heads and hearts. Because spiritual direction is a scared space where we don’t check part of ourselves or part of our formation at the door, but instead come and explore all that stuff with someone who cares for us in the light and truth of the Spirit.
Michelle is a Spiritual Director and End of Life Doula. She is the founder of Abide in the Spirit.
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